'Survivor: South Pacific': Coach says 'I look a little bit like a moron.' Really?

Image credit: Monty Brinton/CBS

There’s no doubt about it: Benjamin “Coach” Wade likes to show off. So the only thing to do in that situation is clear — encourage him to show off even more! Feed the beast, baby! So, when I set down and chatted with the newly self-proclaimed Zenslayer the day before filming began on Survivor: South Pacific – and after forcing him to share another random survival story, and hearing his radical plans for the final Tribal Council — I asked him to give me a play by play on his epic new tattoo, because really, who doesn’t want to hear Coach describing the badassery of his latest body ink? This led to a discussion on the perils of improper sunscreen application. I then asked Coach to sign off by offering another gem from his clearly-memorized book of pseudo-motivational quotes. Whom would he pick? Confucius? Nietzsche? Sun Tzu? The suspense will simply kill you as you watch the video clip below. And for more Survivor news and views, follow me on Twitter @EWDaltonRoss. Take it away, Coach…

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  • David

    Recent survivor seasons have each had a “ringer”,a person chosen mostly because they are a total kook so that the show can focus on him or her for ratings and as filler.Coach is one of them and apparently CBS hasn’t quite finished using him.I was really unhappy to hear he was one of the two returning players and I hope his tribemates kick him off quickly.

    • MOn

      I think you’re wrong and I hope the dragon slayer will slay. Ha!

  • …..

    Really people???? Come on you can’t be serious that people actually care about this stupid s***

  • Kyle

    Who is this Jackass!

    • PK

      haha. True fan. That’s what Erin said about Coach in Tocantins.

      Go Hantz!

  • CG

    Maybe you think you look a little bit like a moron is because you are a moron

  • Dump Probst

    The guy is terrible at playing this game . If they’re going to insist of bring back former players for every game at least limit it to those who have done well and made it far in the game . Next I suppose they’ll bring back awful players Stupert and Jenna who totally laid down in All Stars and let Rob and Amber walk all over them ! Dumb players who are colorful do not make a good Survivor despite what gay overlord show host Probst thinks in his tiny mind !

  • David

    I’m really disappointed that Survivor is yet again bringing back former players who lost the game even more than once! I was okay with an all-stars edition every few years. But I don’t want to see former players who couldn’t win the first or second time coming back. And don’t even get me started on the Redemption Island thing. Now you can get voted out by the whole tribe and still come back at the end. Ridiculous. This may be the first season that I skip.

    • etm

      David, I agree. It also annoys me that they are letting people who’ve appeared on other reality shows compete too. Out of the thousands that audition for the show they come up with Russell’s nephew and some girl who was on a country music show?

  • Oregon

    Welcome back Coach. The show is entertainment and season after season we hear from the group of ” I hate this (insert this years hated twist) and will never watch again” . So don’t watch and comment it will not hurt our feelings if you go away. There are many of us that have enjoyed all 23 seasons and the way the show has made changes to try and keep itself fresh. Some work some don’t. I love how the players forget they are players in a game and take this all so personal. The middle school drama from grown adults makes you sit back and laugh.
    I am ready for Survivor to entertain me once again.

    • teresa

      Totally agree with you Oregon.

    • Joe

      Agreed. Some people just want to complain.

      Remember the Medallion of Power? They dropped that as soon as they realized it didn’t work at all. The producers realized that RI doesn’t work a little so they re-tooled it. They know what they’re doing. It’s their job, after all.

    • MOn

      so true

    • mat8212

      You must have a very low IQ and even lower expectations. I Hope a running program will improve over time not repeat dumbass ,bragging losers such as Wade. He is such a joke. No wonder he and Probst get along so well. They both have delusions of grandeur about themselves and their imagined status. I used to love survivor. But over time one grows out of things and moves on to better things. Hope wade gets put out first. Ozzie second.

      • @mat8212

        It is so funny for you to say someone has a very low IQ when you wrote that….whatever that is.
        I’d suggest you lay off on bascially calling people stupid until you get at least a basic understanding of how to write.

  • Dana

    he totally cracks me up

  • Dave Kane

    Survivor appears to be “Jumping the Shark”….last season was a gift to Rob, they loaded up the cast with players they KNEW he would manipulate, since contestants must pass personality and psychological reviews. Rob isn’t the best player, that money was given to him by the producers. Very tired of seeing past contestants return to play against a new cast. Save the repeat players for specail season filled with past contestants. Might sit this season out until producers get their heads on straight again.

    • Joe

      So they “knew” he would win the 50-50 chance to be on the Omatepe tribe?

      • Manny

        If you think anything on “reality TV” is left to CHANCE then you are naive. Everything on these shows is manipulated to suit the outcome that the producers want for an ‘entertaining’ show. Millions of $$$ are at stake – you honestly think they’d just hope that it turns out fun and interesting and will keep viewers tuning in?!? Not a chance.

  • KM

    Coach is a positive spirit and I’m always entertained by him.

    • mat8212

      Then you are hard up for entertainment.

  • Andy

    This is why I hate mixing old and new players. There are 16 new contestants this year, but you wouldn’t know it judging from the promos and EW’s coverage. Yes, Coach is entertaining but we’ve already had two articles all about him in the past week.

    I miss the days when you could consistently count on Survivor to be top-notch television. Then it became a little spottier but was generally still one of the best shows out there. Then for a while you couldn’t be sure what you’d end up with when you tuned in; it could be good or it could be sorta weak. Now you can pretty much depend on it to suck royally, and it all boils down to Jeff Probst and company’s refusal to listen to fans.

  • cary

    I was disappointed to hear that Ozzy and Coash were coming back when there are so many other deserving
    players (Brenda) that have never been given a second chance. Ozzy and Coach has their chance – time to move on. Slay the dragon slayer!

  • Shkago

    If Survivor wants ideas about new twists for the game..ask the viewers! Why not have a show for all those who were voted out FIRST & never got a real chance to play the game. Bringing back Rob, Russell,

    • etm

      I think it’s a great idea to do a season with those voted out first!

  • Shkago

    Rob, Russell, Ozzie & Coach is a lame idea! We’ve seen them…who cares to see them again. Nice gift to Rob, by the way…you tailored a game just for him!!

    • anonymoustachio

      Would you like a crying towel?

  • TheGrump

    It was a treat to listen to “Coach” babble on endlessly and think he was actually a leader. We referred to him as the “Back Seat Driver”.

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